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Working indoors

Meeting face-to-face is the preferred form of counselling for many. But during recent lockdowns many clients and therapists have had to adapt and explore. One solution for me has been to work in a larger space. Knowing that Covid19 transmission is lower in larger, well ventilated spaces I have arranged use of a hall and added an airpurifier which filters the air of viral particles. These measures, when added to the others below, creates conditions that I personally feel are as safe as working outdoors, but with the more traditional inclusion of 4 walls, sofas and less chance of rain. Being almost 100m2 it is not as warm as my usual counselling room, but it feels safe and cosy enough.

It is also a good place for couple counselling.

Back to ways I work page

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Telephone/online counselling

Some people may not be able to attend sessions in person and some people may prefer not to attend sessions in person. Working remotely can offer some challenges to communication, but may also improve circumstances and availability for many. I am pleased to say that I have had good results with many clients via telephone and videocalls.

I have worked with many clients who find eye-contact uncomfortable – this is not a problem on the phone, and with videocalls it can be reduced or eliminated by repositioning the camera or facing away from each other. The camera image still allows us to share the space and to respond to movement, hand gestures and posture.

It is important to iron out the technical challenges and strange idiosyncracies of video calls but this can easily be negotiated and offers some creative opportunities too. Clients have used the chat boxes to write down key phrases and question or to write things they cannot say out loud. Whiteboards and screen sharing allow us to use images, diagrams and drawing exercises to explore non-verbally.

Lastly, working by phone or online allows you to be at home or in a space that you can control. This can be really helpful if travelling to a meeting causes stress or anxiety.

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Working outdoors

Working outdoors is particularly appropriate to the situation we find ourselves in now. Living with the threat of an airborne virus makes the indoors, especially small rooms, a less safe place than usual.

This approach to counselling and psychotherapy is often described as outdoor therapy, eco-therapy or Walk-and-Talk therapy. Client and therapist meet outdoors at a pre-arranged location and walk together. They may stop and sit, or keep moving, they may take the same route each week or explore, but the session does not include four walls and the familiarity of a temperature controlled counselling room. Nature, the weather, passers-by and the “other-than-human” can impact on the session. They can also present welcome opportunities and a wealth of metaphor.

We all know how regenerating a walk can be, and there are good reasons for this. A conversation finds space to breathe outdoors, where the visual input and the rhythms of movement allow for a more reflective experience. Therapy can also happen in these spaces, where our connection to the environment is not ignored. Where we feel ourselves to be part of something larger…

When outdoors, we may be utilising our senses and feelings as much or even more than our verbal capacities. By taking this more embodied approach, working outdoors can deepen the experience and integrate clients in ways that standard therapy conversations struggle to do.

But it is not always right for every client, so I insist on a staged introduction* to the process which allows us to clearly establish wether this process will suit you and wether we can work safely in this way. This includes a preparatory conversation – by phone or video-call, a meeting outside and an assessment by email/phone, before a session or two outside. Then we can decide wether to continue working in this way.

Good literature is available on why this works. Search for eco therapy, or contact me for further info.

*before agreeing to work together outdoors I employ a 3 stage assessment process. This begins with a phone/videocall where we discuss the approach and briefly look at how it might be applicable to you. Then we would meet for a short session outdoors which forms a deeper part of the assessment and a chance to ask each other some questions.

Finally we would agree to a short series of outdoor sessions; perhaps 6, to explore the issues you wish to attend to and to see how we can work together. This part may either come to a natural conclusion, or flow into longer work. Each step provides extra assurance and time to reflect on what you are bringing to your counselling/therapy.

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interesting articles, podcasts and info

Podcast with Steven Porges on social distancing

I really enjoy Steven Porges’ wonderful contributions from the field of neuro-science. His studies of our nervous system have helped to deepen the scientific and therapeutic understanding of what actually happens between people. What he describes is a process common to all mammals, co-regulation, where being together allows us to calm down and assess danger/safety by perceiving (or Neuroception) another’s nervous state. In this time of physical distancing and isolation, we have increased need for contact. By contrast, texting, emailing and “social”media remove the vital elements of vocal tone and facial expression which have evolved over time to help us sense what each other feels, wants, needs, fears etc.

Thanks once again to Serge Prengel’s Relational Implicit podcast for a clear and timely conversation.

https://relationalimplicit.com/porges-social/

Personally I prefer the term physical distancing  because we need to work hard retain the social contact, as Porges says. We need to keep a safe distance to prevent possible viral transmission, but we need to maintain contact to reduce unnecessary anxiety and counter the feeling of isolation. So we talk, we make jokes, send love,… I heard of people dressing as animals and dancing outside their neighbours window on a child’s birthday…we do what we can to make contact and keep connected.

To this end I am seeing clients online using the various video/phone calling methods to meet and work with people. In some cases I am meeting clients outdoors, in the beautiful surroundings of the Calder Valley. This may not always be appropriate, but I am happy to discuss this with new clients.

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Exhibition of Drawings and Paintings 14/15th Sept 2019

For one weekend only – 14/15th Sept 11-5pm

As part of the Todmorden Open Studios Popup

At Todmorden Therapy Space, White Rose Mill, of Rise Lane, OL147AA

Works by Simon Manfield  –  prints available to buy

for more info on Simon see https://simonmanfield.blogspot.com/

Copyright Simon Manfield

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Todmorden Therapy Space

A quiet and peaceful therapy room. With space to talk, create, move and explore.

Sometimes used for art exhibitions and also available for hire.
Click to enlarge pictures.

 

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All info faq Workshops and training

Men affected by suicide – discussion.

This even has finished, but if you have been affected by someone’s suicide or threats to end their life you can contact me through this website and arrange a free phone call.

A free discussion group as part of the Pushing up Daisies festival 2019    May 16th at 7pm

at Todmorden Therapy, off Rise Lane, Todmorden. OL14 7AA

The death of someone close to us can be devastating and disorganising, and loss through suicide can be especially complicated.

If you have been affected by someones suicide or an attempted suicide, or if you yourself have had thoughts of ending your life, please join us for an open, non-judgemental discussion.

This group is for men because they are a group at high risk of suicide and who may also find it hard to talk about such issues. Please join us to help explore or unburden, to illuminate and understand this complex issue. Whilst the subject is serious, we often find that humour and solidarity can make these sessions uplifting and life affirming.

Link to the PUD website for map and lots of other sessions.

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All info faq interesting articles, podcasts and info

Article: Telling young survivors of suicide…

This essay summarises the ideas and research in a well written and researched book Suicidal: why we kill ourselves by Jesse Bering. It speaks of the effect a suicide can have on children, and in particular, how the information about the death is handled. It resists oversimplification and instead details subtleties, evolving narratives and different possibilities, using many examples and case histories. I found it a very good read.

Clicking this link should take you to the article on the AEON website which has many interesting essays on Psychology and more.

This link for info on a men’s discussion group

If you have been affected by someone’s suicide or threats to end their life you can contact me through this website and arrange a free phone call.

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Open discussion on Art and Mental Health

Archive info of  event at Todmorden Therapy Space 2018

Saturday 8th September 2.30-4pm at Todmorden Therapy Space. White rose Mill, off Rise Lane, Todmorden. OL147AA

As an addition to the exhibition of Geoff Read’s collaborative portraits we will host an open discussion broadly around the theme of expressive arts and mental health. More specifically we are interested in how people use expressive activities to understand and tolerate difficulties in their lives.

This is part of the Todmorden Open Studios 2018 event where artists across the town open their studios and invite the public to see their work and workplaces. 

Geoff’s work opens up the traditional role of artist into one of collaborator – he involves his subject in decisions about their portrait – and in some ways, this brings him closer to my role as a counsellor. He offers his skills and experience to facilitate expression, as do I. Non-verbal expression can be as important as words, so I was intrigued to see how Geoff’s work opens up these possibilities to people who may not consider themselves artists, or even creative.

 

A self-portrait can be a statement of identity and a message to the world about the subject’s experience. A person experiencing difficulties may really appreciate some help or assistance in making such a statement and through the process they may also get new perspectives or acquire strength , self-confidence and resilience.

portrait of a father feeling pride and love for his two children.

We hope you can join us to share your ideas and experiences of how expression has helped you in your life, or how you might view your role as an artist, or how you use art and non-verbal mediums to understand your experiences, or how art can be used to impact or change society…

Geoff describes his approach and ethos very well here.

Feel free to contact me via the contact page for enquiries.

 

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All info Different types of therapy

Transactional Analysis concepts

Transactional Analysis or TA is a great way of understanding yourself and how you relate to the rest of the world. It uses simple concepts to help you understand your personality. People use it in many ways, eg to work out why they keep getting into difficult relationships, or why relationships keep stalling. They find interpersonal issue that previously seemed unchangeable can become freer, less scary or less upsetting. Some people use it in work or schools, or even to change an entire organisation. It can go deep into childhood or you can stay in the here and now to analyse your own behaviour, thoughts and feelings.

My training was based in this model of understanding personality and human relationships developed by Eric Berne. Whilst I have added other models and approaches to my work, I still enjoy the simplicity and thoroughness of TA. There are 3 youtube videos by Theramin Trees which explain the basic concepts. Books on TA cover a huge range of topics, too numerous to mention.